Six months. Four countries. Eleven cities. 1,885 photos. 180 students. More planes, trains, buses, vans, tuk tuks, cabs, motorcycles, and songthaews than imaginable. New lifelong friends. Countless memories. Hundreds of temples. And I still have six more months left! Who’s ready for the next leg of my journey? Because I sure am curious to see where these next months will take me. (Of course, I already have plans in the making!)
These past six months have been filled with hard work, some doubts, some depression, and a lot of happiness, love, new experiences, and new sights. It’s a great mix that has shaped me for the better. When things don’t go as planned – items are stolen, lesson plans fall flat, transportation schedules go awry – I’ve learned that when you look for the good and lean on yourself magic happens. It’s a marvelous feeling when a student finally understands a concept, when I see breathtaking views, when a local and I are able to communicate despite language disparities. The good moments keep me strong and their memories linger far longer than those of the bad.
During my time here I’ve had experiences I didn’t fully anticipate: true happiness and deep sadness; times of loneliness tempered with the making of life-long friends; unidentifiable foods, most of which were delicious (although I still don’t know what they were); incredible travels in areas some people only dream about; a deepening appreciation for Asian culture and history, and so much more. There have been hardships and stumbling blocks, but mostly I’ve been able to figure out solutions on my own, pick myself up and keep going. If you’re lucky, adversity teaches reliability and brings strength.
This is the first time I have ever lived alone. That can be difficult enough, but instead of doing it in my home country, I chose a place where I didn’t know the language, was unfamiliar with the culture, and knew absolutely no one. The idea was enthralling; the reality an adventure. I’m strong, capable and adventurous and have loved almost every minute. But, it’s not easy. Living abroad, especially by yourself, is difficult. There is no network of friends nearby, no loving family to visit on a weekend. It takes time to learn the simplest things, such as how to order food, or recognize local landmarks, so you can easily find your way home. Even with extensive research and being well prepared, I still struggled initially.
However, once I looked inward I realized how strong I really am, how much I can handle, and how to make myself content/happy without the help of others. Despite the physical distance, friends, family, and loved ones are easily contactable and make living alone seem less lonely. I’ve also made several good friends and we’ve had some fun times (girls-only nights are amazing). One lesson learned: Next time I live alone I will have a pet as I can’t cuddle plants. Another lesson: I’ve become very comfortable just “being.” Being in the moment. Being present. Being okay with myself: who I am, what I want, what I need; my flaws, my advantages. It has been a bit of an uphill battle to get to this point, and I know I still have a ways to go to be fully content and happy, but I’m secure in my skin and happy with who I am right now.
Just as important – I’m looking forward to my next six months teaching and learning in Thailand!